Tom Russell - Heritage Christian Counseling Ministries
Every Thursday during the 8 o'clock and 9 o'clock hour, WVMC General Manager Scott Saunders and Tom Russell from Heritage Christian Counseling Ministries sit down and talk about issues facing the family.
Topic for February 6th and February 27th: Things to Know Before Marriage
1. The Divorce rate is 50%
2. The Divorce rate goes higher if:
a. either partner is a teenager
b. either partner has experienced an unhappy marriage
c. either partner has experienced divorce in their parent's marriage
d. either partner is using illegal drugs
e. the couple has engaged in sexual involvement
3. People who make good lifelong marriage partners overlook minor offenses and injustices.
4. Seven things to consider before walking down the aisle.
1. Make sure the decision is your own.
2. Verify your partners' emotional health. Could you live "Happily Ever After" if your partner didn't change at all.
3. Consider the advice of friends and family.
4. Don't rush to the alter.
5. Watch for changes in enthusiasm - Conqueror Mentality.
6. Get professional counseling - Prepare.
7. Be completely honest with yourself - Prayer helps here.
Topic for February 13th: Sure Fire Marriage Killers
1. Overcommitment and Physical Exhaustion
a. These two are the leading reasons why couples don't have more intimacy.
a. We all have an emotional bank account. In marriage we either make deposits or withdrawals.
b. Two givers (depositers) produces a synergistic relationship - one that is better than if it were apart.
c. Two takers or taker and a giver is a recipe for disaster.
3. Unrealistic Expectations
a. If you have high expectations in your marriage and they aren't met; how does that feel?
b. How is that communicated?
c. If you lower your expectations and they are exceeded; how does that feel?
d. Expectations are best used when they are vertical ones rather than horizontal.
4. Abuse and Addiction
a. These are agreed on by most secular counselors as reasons for divorce. Christian counselors
would seek healing first.
a. The precentages of Christian men falling to this is staggering.
b. There is hope here! If your marriage is struggling from this seek professional Christian Counseling.
6. Sexual Frustration, Loneliness, Low Self Esteem, and Infidelity
a. These will rot away a marriage over time.
b. Christian Counseling can help here as well.
Topic for February 20th: Wisdom Gained from 50 Year Marriages
Ps 127:1 "Unless the Lord builds the house, the work of the builders is useless."
Dr. Dobson surveyed 600 people and here are the basic fundamentals that they recommended:
a. Christ Centered homes
This includes Bible study and prayer.
This gives a young couple a tremendous advantage over couples who don't.
It is Christ who strengthens us when the storms of life challenge our marriages.
A determinded attitude.
Make a list of activities that facilitate communication and do them. ex. walking, biking, going out to eat.
Final thought / Question
What do you want your kids to be saying at your 50th anniversary party about your marriage?
- March 29thNational Christian Hip-Hop Recording Artist THI'SL
- March 30thThe Ball Brothers in Concert
- April 5thJenny and Tyler Concert